Preschool and Tears

It's hard to imagine that almost 3 years ago, a post to this blog would have been about the finalization of our adopting Courtney. How quickly time passes...because instead, today I'm posting about Courtney starting pre-school.

She was so excited! Courtney is incredibly smart, witty and has more energy than any other 3 year old I have ever known. She has been counting down for weeks to go to Miss Barbara's for school. The look on her face says it all.

Courtney LOVED preschool. She asked me when I dropped her off if I was going to throw her a big party like Marquessa's first day of school. (I had only planned on doing this little tradition when starting kindergarten, but I couldn't break her heart over something so easy.) So, I told her it wouldn't be a 'big party', but we'd have a little one.

She was quite pleased with her balloons and M&M's. She hugged me and said, "Thanks mom. I love little things..." It's true, it is the little things that make life better. Courtney is one of the little things that makes my life better.

I've already admitted to being a tad emotional. So, bear with me as I shed a few tears over this one.

For the first time in over 5 years, I had an hour and a half to myself. I keep hearing things like: 'you'll get used to it', or 'you're going to love having them both in school', and even 'you won't have time to miss them'.

News flash! I have time to miss them; I actually like having my kids home...so having them in school is hard for me. I know I'll 'get used to it', but when planning out my life I didn't anticipate having 2 kids in school and not having more kids at home. That realization, and that understanding that I cannot plan for, or know when to expect to have more kids at home...well, it struck a bit of a sensitive cord today.

Taking Courtney to pre-school was so much harder for me than sending Marquessa off to kindergarten. I cried more today than the whole day of Marquessa's first day at public education.

We also celebrated the "Back-to-School" season with SaraJane, Courtney's birthmom. Courtney chose Pei Wei (again!). She wanted chicken, noodles and "pick-up sticks" (chopsticks). It was so much fun being able to visit and catch up for a while.

I am so incredibly grateful for my sweet girls and my marvelous man. Even through these little struggles, I know that I have so much to be grateful for, and I can see that I am blessed beyond belief....